Beautiful Scars
by HarvestGirl10
Summary: There once was a time when he was happy. When nothing else mattered but the smile on her face. A time when he realized what it was like to be in love. However, no man is placed in this world without a penance. Always, there will be a price. A hero, a leader, must always give in to sacrifice. Until one days these scars bear all. Scars...that do not simply wash away. Amon X OC fic.


Hey everyone! I'm back with a new fanfiction, this time set in the Legend of Korra universe :) Ugh, I just can't contain all these Legend of Korra finale feels T_T Amon, the guy who I used to despise, ended up being my favorite character in the entire series xO Especially because his back story is so epic and sad. However, there wasn't much in the explanation on how exactly Noatak rose to be Amon which disappointed me. So, with my writer instincts kicking in, I decided to write a fanfiction portraying these events! I hope you like it~

* * *

_No man is placed in this world without a penance._

_To live. _

_To die. _

_To remember._

_Always, there will be a price._

_And nothing can end this vicious cycle. _

_A hero, a leader, must always give in to sacrifice. _

_Fall into these inevitable depths of tainted memories._

_Until one days these scars bear all..._

_**...Scars that do not simply wash away. **_

* * *

Throughout his followers, his fellow equalists, there was one unspoken rule. That rule, being strictly enforced through the softest of whispers, was that Amon was a man of privacy. Every fiber of the leader demanded it. Whether it be through the threat of his hand, the tone of his smooth voice, or the penetrative gaze discovered only through a mask... something burned.

Behind the doors of his private room, there was more. So much more. No one was allowed inside, not even the favored lieutenant, and once Amon shut himself in...he stayed.

Until the sun rose again.

Once the man knew his doors were securely shut and locked, a slight sigh dared to escape from his lips. The guards that stood by his door would shift throughout the night, keeping the leader alert at all times. Not that it mattered, of course. Anyone who dared to betray him could easily be dealt with. That fact brought some comfort to the thought of someone standing outside a room while he slept. No matter how superior he may appear to be, Amon was still troubled by that knowledge.

"Yet, there are far more troubling things in the world than an invasion of privacy." His voice was soft, a murmur, as he walked along the wooden floor of his quarters. No matter what angle, he was right. Every day there was a growing threat to the revolution.

_His Foolish Brother. _

_That Naive Avatar. _

_All Her Blind Followers. _

Amon couldn't help but laugh. His plans were falling together smoother than expected. By any rate, Republic City will finally rise to a much greater potential-

A sturdy breeze broke through into the room, breaking free from the once tightly shut window. The equalist leader's laughter broke as he turned towards the wind and the clattering shutters. Effortlessly, his darkened hood followed the lead of the wind and fell, revealing hidden locks of blackened hair. The sensation...was compelling. Amon braced himself as the wind grew rougher, stirring more papers out of their folders and drawers with an increasing strength.

Catching his breath, he looked up and around as his masked eyes scanned the area...before he froze. Laid simply out in front of him, the simple mirror he settled upon one of his dressers stared right back at him. More so, the same piercing reflection he grew into...met his gaze.

_Blue eyes hidden behind a monstrous mask. A person hiding behind a mysterious cloak. That is what he saw before him in the mirror that spoke every truth. The truth he didn't want to admit to himself._

The wind slowly stopped, bring its dance to an end. Papers, once high in the air, fluttered effortlessly down around the equalist leader as he looked at himself. Almost...as if he couldn't believe who he was.

_Keeping contact with the reflection before him, Amon reached for the tiny piece of string that held his identity. Slowly, the twine came undone and the mask fell forward into his hands...revealing only a worn, tired man. _

The red paint was smeared along his jawline. The clay that covered his dark eyebrows was beginning to chip. An effort in vain, his true identity seemed to defy what he has become with each passing night.

_He wiped away the lies from his face. _

_Lies, that for their purpose, exist to deceive the world. _

_To fool everyone._

_Except himself. _

And then suddenly, Amon was gone. The equalist leader who sparked the secular revolution...just vanished. Before him, standing in the mirror, stood someone else. A completely different person. Another man.

_Noatak. _

For a split second, the room around him vanished. The cruel, frosty winds of the North Pole nipped at his body as the reflection shifted again into a younger, confused boy. Noatak stared in horror at the reflection. But then, as quick as it came, he was back in his quarters once more and regained his present image. Noatak coughed back the gasp that threatened to fall from his throat. He couldn't look at his reflection anymore, sometimes it just made his head hurt.

Recollecting himself, Noatak turned to exam the mess around him. His brow creased as he frowned, realizing the mess he would have to clean up and reorganize before any thoughts of sleep tempt him.

.

"How...annoying." He muttered in disdain, picking up a few documents and setting them idly on a nearby desk. The process was repeated again and again, displeasing the man as he sought to regroup his collection of manifestos and articles. Most of them involved the revolution but then there were others of a more personal nature. Others that if not for the wind, Noatak swore to keep out of anyone's sight.

Swiftly, he started to pick up the papers without a second glance as the need for sleep washed over him. His eyes grew blind to the identical scrolls and documents as he glazed over them without a second thought...but then something happened.

Noatak stopped. With just a simple, small piece of paper in his hands...he just stopped.

"How did this get here?" His voice was a whisper, stunned. Looking down at the paper, an old and faded photograph, Noatak found himself against shifting away from Amon and back to another time.

_A much happier time. _

_As happy as the girl smiling in the photograph._

_As content as the boy next to her. _

Closing his eyes, Noatak tried to think back to the memory. The warmth of the night. The stupid smile he wore. The smell of sweet blossoms. The sound of her voice.

"_But...I don't see a monster. I see a person, a person whose heart beats just like mine." _

"Misaki..." Opening his eyes, he looked at the photograph again in longing. He would do anything to go back.

_To where he didn't have to fight to feel equal. _

_To when her dreams were his reality._

_To when his eyes first saw hers. _

_**All those years ago...**_

* * *

_~Beautiful Scars~_

_Chapter 1_

* * *

Noatak didn't remember when it all went black. Perhaps it was while he was running from his father, his anger fueling his drive. Or maybe, it was when his legs got the best of him and he found himself falling forward into the snow...the arctic wind wasting no time cutting through his body. Regardless, the young teen panicked.

He couldn't see. Couldn't smell. Couldn't move anything. The only sensation right now coursing through his body was touch...and right now, all he felt was _cold. _A terrible, burning cold. Noatak never knew such a pain existed. Was this...what bloodbending finally felt like?

"_You...are mine."_

His father's voice echoed into his subconscious, bringing a sense of panic and fear along with the sound. Noatak cursed the spirits at the very thought of his father finding him, dragging him back home. If that is what happened, then Tarrlok must have lost his faith and obeyed Yakone. The two must have tracked him down, bloodbended him, brought this agonizing and freezing pain with them.

"Is the kid gonna be alright?"

Noatak's senses heightened at the sound of a voice. A voice that didn't belong to his father, or Tarrlok, or anyone else he knew. Something within the young waterbender lifted and the thought of freedom was again restored within his ailing body. But then again, that freedom did nothing to ease the _unbearable pain._

"He's unconscious, so he'll live. However, if we can't bring up his body temperature soon..." Another voice lingered into his subconscious. However, unlike the other voice which was rough and manly, this voice was soothing and sweet. The tone of a girl...

"Look." The girl spoke again, "He's clenching his teeth. That's a good sign." A sigh was heard from both voices. "That means that his body is realizing that it needs to warm itself. If he was left out in the snow, his body would never have snapped back."

"Poor guy. Lucky we found him when we did..." The man spoke, a sympathetic tone in his voice. "Or he would have perished in that storm."

At this moment, Noatak already felt as if he died. He couldn't connect any feelings in his body to the cold, painful sensations he felt and he swore there was no pain like it. It was if his body was freezing yet burning up at the same time, and he had no choice but to be physically torn between the two.

"All alone in a blizzard with no proper provisions and soaked clothes, no wonder he caught Arctic Fever." The girl muttered, "To think someone from the Northern Water Tribe would know better than that."

Slowly, a gentle warmth crept inside Noatak's chest. Painful sensations of cold and numbness gave way at a steady pace to this new heat and with each passing moment, Noatak found himself able to breathe. His head soon stopped aching, his heart stopped its rapid throbbing, everything in his body just relaxed...

"We don't know everything, Misaki. When he wakes up, I'm sure he'll tell us what happened out there."

Noatak felt warmer, peaceful, relieved. Whatever pain antagonized his body was long forgotten and now instead, a blissful temperature remained. However, the notion of sleep grew increasingly as the warmth overtook the young teen's body. There was a silence followed by much-needed heat. The demand for sleep grew too strong for Noatak as the strange voices carried in and out...until finally they were nothing but a soft murmur.

"Botan...something tells me that, maybe, he has a reason not to."

* * *

"_Noatak!"_

He ran.

The cries of his brother calling out for him were echoing against the blizzard's snow, but he didn't care. For once in his life, he was allowed to _simply not care. _

"_Noatak, wait! Come back!" _

There was a fuel that burned inside of him, an adrenaline that kept him going against the scorching winds. Yet, Noatak persisted in his pursuit. Finally, he would escape his father and all his cruel, selfish aspirations. Finally, he would stop living as a mindless tool of revenge. Finally...he could be free.

"_Don't go! Please!"_

Tarrlok was beyond saving. Over the harsh years, his little brother never once built a strong enough exterior to resist their father despite his abuse. And now, he couldn't even gather enough courage to leave. Of all things, Tarrlok _chose_ to stay.

So he was left behind. Everything, was left behind. Noatak will let this blizzard sweep him away from this life and take him somewhere new. Somewhere far, far away from this hell.

"_How...DARE YOU!" _

Noatak came to a violent halt, eyes wide in fear.

"ANGHH!" A scream screeched out from his lips as his body froze, then contorted itself in all directions. The blood in his body burned as his neck snapped over to the left while his muscles jolted towards the right. Another scream escaped from Noatak as he was brought down to his knees in the cold snow.

"You think you can run away. _You think you have a choice." _The voice of his father came from behind, each syllable dripping with malice and twisted delight. "But in reality, you-" Noatak screamed as his body convulsed, "Are-" again. "Nothing." and again.

Yakone bloodbent his son around and bent his neck sharply to make eye contact. Noatak's frightened blue eyes started into his father's cold, lifeless, and wicked gaze.

"I..." Noatak cringed, finding it almost impossible to move his jaw. Each word he pronounced sent a violent shock wave throughout his body, his teeth clenching with every effort to speak. "Thought...your bending...was taken...away!"

Yakone laughed wickedly at his son as the sky darkened and thunder roared. Noatak let out a devastating scream as he was lifted off the ground, his limbs twisting and blood searing with an excruciating pain. His father did nothing but smile.

"You think you are so mighty, but I created you. _I made you what you are!_" Noatak clenched his teeth. His father's bending was becoming stronger and stronger with each passing moment. He didn't know how much longer he would last...

"_And I can easily...take it all away." _

Noatak cried out in pain as he saw his father smile wickedly one last time...

_Before Yakone ripped his body apart._

* * *

"_NO!" _Noatak cried out in a cold sweat as he jolted from his slumber. Only to be met with a painful head on collision.

"_Ouch!_ Hey, be careful!"

Rubbing his own forehead, Noatak looked down at himself in alarm. When did he fall asleep in a bed? Where were his close? Why was his body bandaged? _And more importantly, why was green paste all over his chest?_

"But I guess you're finally awake. So I'll forgive you, _this time_." The moment Noatak heard the aggravated voice, the gross green paste became the last of his concerns. He slowly turned his attention from his body to the girl sitting next to him, a concerned gaze found within soft violet eyes. She obviously didn't look like anyone he had seen before back home. Unlike the girls from his village, this one had her hair long for the purpose of wearing it as it was. No fancy braids, combs, or anything. And it was of the strangest color. Auburn. Noatak only saw such a shade in pieces of wood used to heat his home but never on a person's head. It looked...pretty.

So many question filled the young teen's mind but as he opened his mouth to speak, his tongue went dry. At that sensation, the sudden burning in his throat soon made itself known. Noatak quickly put a hand to it, flinching. He needed _water._ Suddenly, his eyes widened a realization.

_Water._

Frantically, the waterbender quickly scanned the room he was in as the presence of water around him was _strong. Unbearably strong. _It was under him, around him, swaying the room along with its waves...

"Am I...on a ship?" He managed to speak, yet his voice proved hoarse and dry. Neglecting the burning sensation that dwindled in his vocal chords, the young waterbender focused on the rock of the waves around him and the sudden awareness of it all. He wasn't in just a room, but a _cabin. _

"_Shh,"_The girl shushed him by placing the palm of her hand on his mouth, "Your body hasn't received any liquids in _days._" With her other hand, she reached for a cup on the nightstand. "Before you say or ask anything else, you have to drink this."

Noatak, his mouth still covered, took the small cup from the girl's hands. Looking down, his eye twitched in disgust. It wasn't water, like he had hoped, but something slimy and green. _Disgusting. _

"It's an herbal remedy that will not only quench your thirst but keep your body warm." She slowly removed her hand from his mouth, her voice softer. "We found you in a blizzard, just lifeless in the snow. You've contracted Arctic Fever from the cold and if you don't keep your body warm while you rest, the fever will come back."

The thought of the pain once again burning throughout his system panicked the teen as he stared once again at the green drink. For a second, he could have sworn he saw the mixture _bubble. _He looked at the girl, who sternly nodded, before once again to the drink. A grimace placed itself upon his lips as he raised the cup...and drank the mixture.

"_Blargh!" _As soon the infusion made contact with the back of his throat, Noatak spat out the liquid. A fit of giggles erupted from the girl.

"What was that?" Noatak yelled, his chest heaving in disgust as he tried to catch his breath. The girl held back a chuckle at the sight. The waterbender glared at the girl. At this moment, he already decided that he did not her. Or her disgusting drinks. _Or her stupid boat. _

"Oh, I'm sorry." She still was giggling when she rose from his bedside, her hand trying to hide her chuckling lips. "It may look bad now, but I was just testing to see if your reflexes were immobilized or not by the fever." However, by the laughter in her tone, Noatak had a hard time believing her.

"Here," She giggled as she walked across the room, "Let me get you something to drink for real now."

As she walked, Noatak couldn't help but notice the grace in each step she took. Even despite the occasional wave that rocked the ship, not once did the girl falter as she came back with a genuine cup of water.

Hesitantly at first, Noatak stared at the drink before the girl forced it into his hands.

"Seriously, if you don't drink it this time you'll die of dehydration before we reach port." The giggles in her voice stopped, and sincerity remained. Gently, the girl cupped her hands around Noatak's. A sudden warmth rushed over his body as his skin met hers. He couldn't describe the feeling but as his blue eyes glanced over at the girl, she seemed oblivious to the sudden heat. Slowly, she raised the cup to him and once the liquid reached his lips-

"_MISAKI!"_ The door to the cabin barged open and a rough, muscular man stood in the doorway, his figure basked in the immediate sunlight that overcame the room. Almost too quickly, Noatak spit out the water and started choking on whatever remained in his throat. The girl dropped her hands from Noatak's and glared angrily at the man in the doorway.

"Botan! You shouldn't just barge in like that!" She scolded as the man quickly approached the bedside.

"I heard a commotion up on deck so I naturally assumed the kid woke up," A smirk, then a chuckle escape him as his eyes settled on Noatak. "And I was right!"

Regaining his breath, Noatak looked up at the man who appeared twice both his and the girl's size. His muscles were the first thing that met the eye, his sailing tunic doing nothing to cover them. For a split second, Noatak felt intimidated. That is, until the man spoke once more.

"So my Misaki gave you the juice, didn't she!" His laughter bellowed from his chest and echoed across the room. There was something friendly in his rough voice, something shocking to hear if the man wouldn't have spoken. However, as soon as he spoke, a rough, playful smack came across Noatak's backside. The young waterbender recoiled forward, coughing up a choke from the contact. If there was anything doubt in the man's strength, it long vanished by now.

"Botan! Be careful with him!" The girl put an arm in front of Noatak, dividing him away from the man. "The last thing I need is to treat an open wound _caused by you_!"

"Aye, the kid is fine! If he can survive Arctic Fever, than he can definitely handle a well-earned slap on the back!" The older man grinned cheekily, his short beard stretching from ear to ear. "Why don't you watch the crew up top while I see how he's doing for now?"

"But he might still need attention..." The girl started but was quickly cut off by a muscular arm around the shoulder, leading her towards the door.

"Nonsense! I promise I won't hurt him. So you can go run along and order those men to work! You and I both know they listen to you more than me anyway!" Before the girl could even protest, Botan had her already at the door frame and out the door.

"What are you-!" But the door was slammed shut before another word was said.

"_BO-TAN!" _Sounds of fists slamming repeatedly against the door were heard as Botan amused himself by holding the door shut. He flashed another grin towards Noatak, "Just give her a moment, she'll wear herself out." And true to his words, there was a harsh kick to the door followed by a huff. Then silence.

"Ah," He smirked, "Told ya." Botan released his hold of the door and faced Noatak, who grew alert again at the sight of the man. With each step he took towards the bed, Noatak found an almost uncanny resemble to his father's figure. Strong, tough, not a force to be reckoned with. But then again, neither was he.

_'If he knew what I could do to him right now...how hospitable would he be still?' _The thought couldn't help but dance across the young bloodbender's mind. However, there was something different besides a force of power within this man. There was a gentle radiance that emitted from those dark brown eyes, a youthful boast in every gesture he made. Also, when this man reached out for the nearby chair, Noatak did not expect him to twirl it around and straddle it.

"I'm glad to see you're doing okay, kid. You had me worried when I found ya." Botan let out a sigh of relief as he took of his bandana, revealing black hair neatly tied in a low ponytail. As he wiped his face with the rag, Noatak's attention peaked.

"You...found me? Who are you? And what am I doing here?" Noatak asked. His voice was still hoarse from thirst, or perhaps from the fever that overtook him. Botan ushered him to drink whatever was left in his cup.

"I'll answer those questions one at a time. First, I'll start it off easy by introducing myself." A muscular arm reached itself to Noatak, "I'm Botan!" A cheery smile featured itself upon the man's face, "The captain of this fine vessel and the head tradesmen of Fahlen village."

"Fahlen village...?" Noatak murmured as he shook the large hand, taking in what Botan said. "How did I end up on a trading ship for Fahlen village?"

Botan rubbed his head, "Fahlen is one of the main trading ports in the northern Earth Kingdom. We trade with other Earth Kingdom towns and cities, even some stations in the United Republic of Nations, but we are best known for being the sole trading post with the North Pole."

Noatak froze.

"Now, we only head down once in a few months- since it's expensive to make such a trip and all- and when we docked at one of the ports, I decided to see if I could get some hunting done in the meantime. A polar bear dog's coat goes for a lot these days, you know?" The man started to go off on a gleeful tangent, but soon his tone grew serious. "While I was out there, I found you kid. And you didn't look good. I thought you were dead in the snow at first, until I noticed you were convulsing. Thank the spirits Misaki was along for the venture or else who knows what would have happened to you."

Noatak finished his water, staring at the bottom of the cup. He suddenly recalled the touch of the girl and the soft warmth her touch gave him. "That girl..." He looked up to Botan, "The one who was in here...she saved me?"

Botan nodded, his face proud. "Aye, she did. That girl of mine has a talent with plants and knows every trick in the book when it comes to healing. She's no waterbender but I'd trust her." He pointed to the green paste on Noatak's chest, "That's something she's famous for in the village. That warming paste of her's. I don't know how she does it but she can cure Arctic Fever better than anyone I know. That's why I allow her to come along," Botan waved a finger, "To help maybe save a life out on this boat. And thankfully, she did. Fifteen years of life in that girl and she has saved more lives than any healer in Fahlen, that's for sure."

Noatak touched the paste on his chest, staring at the gooey substance in awe. The texture didn't feel hot or warm, but his body certainly felt better from before. _He felt...warm. _It's been a long time since he felt a sensation like that.

"This is her room too, ya know. The only room with any sort of privacy on the ship besides the barracks below. We took you aboard in order for Misaki to work on you but time was running out for our shipment. Fahlen would be in financial distress if we didn't return with some coin and goods soon, so we set sail while you were still being treated."

Noatak's eyes widened. So it was true. He was finally free of the North Pole. His family was out of his reach, his mother, his brother, his father...

_Everything he knew, a whole other land away. _

"It's a sticky situation, I know, but I promise you I'll take you back on our next venture so you can go back to your family-"

"I don't have a family." Noatak's words cut Botan short. The tradesmen stared at the boy at a loss of words before his eyes softened, "You don't?"

Noatak found himself at a standstill. The words just poured out of his mouth without any conscious effort. At that moment, the teen had to think. Perhaps at one time he did have a family. A loving, nurturing family. But over the years, that ideal became nothing more than an empty shell of lies...and taint.

"Nothing is left." Noatak whispered, clenching the cup tight in his grasp. "What's left of my family died in the blizzard." He shut his blue eyes, trying to forget any memory that held him. Of his mother. His brother. His wretched father...

Suddenly, a comforting hand was on his shoulder. Noatak looked up at Botan, a sad smile on his face. "What's your name, kid?"

As much as the hate within him lingered, as much as the sickening feeling in his stomach swelled at the thought of what his name brought him, the young bloodbender came to a pause. Slowly, his hand once again rested itself upon the green goo that was spread amongst his body and he felt the warmth once more. For a second, he was at ease.

"Noatak."

* * *

Her bare feet dangled off the side of the crow's nest, idling saying back and forth with the ocean's breeze. Eyes of violet lingered off into the distance, keeping a watchful eye of the arctic land that slowly faded in the distance.

"_Er...stop!...I'm not...your...revenge!" Misaki jumped at the sound of a voice and turned towards the boy in her bed. His teeth clenched violently and his body was jolting about, a sense of fear in each jerk made. _

"_H-Hey!" Misaki ran towards him in alarm. She threw her arms on him, trying her best to hold him still. "C-Calm down! Are you hurt?" _

The auburn-haired girl leaned back against the wooden post, her lips in a tight knot as her hair flew with the day's wind. A soft sigh escaped her lips...

_To no use, she tried her best to hold the boy. Green paste from her previous treatment smeared all over her tunic and onto her sheets, but she didn't care. With suck violent movements, his body could succumb to convulsion and harm himself!_

"_Stay still! It's okay, it's going to be okay! No one is trying to hurt you!" _

_The boy jerked back and forth. No words would reach him. Nothing seemed to soothe him. He just kept talking in his sleep..._

"_You are...a monster. Made me...a monster..." _

"_NO!" _

"_Ouch! Hey,be careful!" _

In the privacy of her nest, no one dared interrupt her thoughts. She was safe, alone, not to be bothered. Perhaps this was how it should always be...

"A monster..." Misaki couldn't help but laugh softly to herself, raising her arm before her. Slowly, she flexed her fingers and a soft flame bloomed from within her palm. A sad smile graced her lips, her hair flowing out from behind her.

"You have no idea..."

_And then, as soon as the flame burned, Misaki clenched her fist tight._

_Withering the embers until they died..._

* * *

Thoughts? Comments? Reviews? :3 Let me know what you think so far! I had so much fun writing this, you have no idea ^_^ _  
_

I've always wondered how Noatak managed to escape in a blizzard with no provisions or anything O.O Don't lie to yourself and say that you haven't thought about it either! I really can't wait to flesh out this story some more and give some background to the other characters xD Seriously, I love Botan so much. I wish I had a crazy father figure like him around hehehe

And who knows? Maybe we'll meet some familiar faces along the way ;)

Until next time~!_  
_


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